"If we are faithless, he remains faithful - for he cannot deny himself." - 2 Timothy 2:13

Friday, March 25, 2011

A Multitasking Generation

Being 27 years old - I am definitely in the prime of the multitasking generation.  Almost everything we do has us doing more than one thing at a time.  I noticed this most recently when driving today - I had this need to either play with my phone or be on the phone while driving.  Driving alone wasn't enough, time is too precious.  I needed to accomplish something else at the same time. 
That is a pretty optimal picture of what life is like anymore.  It's not just in the car...We have to multitask at everything - Cooking, work, shopping, watching television, playing a game with your kids, sports, and even with God.  I admit - I am 100% guilty.  I like to check facebook at red lights while driving; I like to eat while watching TV; I like to read while watching TV; I like to socialize and have deep conversations while playing sports; I love to multitask!  I am a woman who loves lists...Even if it doesn't look like I am multitasking, I am.  I am making one of probably 5 lists in my head - ranging from Budget editing, what needs to be bought at the grocery store, what my calendar looks like, what I need to work on with in my spiritual life, and a general to do list. 

The problem is that I have gotten so used to doing this in the rest of my life, that I do the same to God.  NOW THAT'S JUST NOT FAIR!  God calls us to "Be still before the Lord and wait patiently in Him;" - Psalms 37:7...Be still...Not - do twenty different things while talking to God.  I am very guilty of letting my prayer time be in the car - It's a great time for me to focus on God, but it shouldn't be the only time.  Are our quiet times, really quiet?  Do you really only focus on God, or are you writing a list in the back of your head of things to do today, or things that happened already? 

As much as I am a fan of the multitasking generation, I think that there is a time to call it quits.  God needs to be our only thought, our only concern, not just one of many.  Sometimes, I think that if our generation of people could get back to the basics and primary concerns of life - (Dinner with family being just that - dinner, not phone calls and texts from others; Game time with your kids being just game time - not game in front of the television time) - then perhaps we could start understanding society...Perhaps then we could start understanding God and God's purpose for our lives...Take time out of your day for God alone this week, rest solely in Him and watch what He can do! 

Oh - and one more thing - It is Friday of March Madness, so I must throw out a Go CATS! 

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Clarity - Amazing how God works

So - for me I have always thought God made you choose.  You chose which path you wanted to go down, God would use you either way, but you only got one chance to made the decision in which direction you want to go...I WAS COMPLETELY WRONG!  God gives us chance after chance.  He can switch our paths in the smallest of seconds, or the biggest of years.  No matter what though, He is going to guide us to where we need to be.  We don't all need to be the missionaries in Malawi in order to meet God's will for our lives, but we do need to be missionaries - no matter where we are.  In a secular job or a christian job - We need to seek God out in everything and make it known that your life is dedicated to God, you aren't perfect, but you definitely want to see everyone else around you seeking God as well.

This week has been a rough one for me - I was offered a job, which normally would be a cause for great joy, still is, but I was very hesitant.  You see this job is an in industry in which I previously worked and I did not like who I became in that industry...It also required a large pay-cut.  It's hard when you found an ideal job you were comfortable in to feel like you are taking a step backwards, so I was in great turmoil this week until today - I had been praying for clarity and expected this LOUD BOOMING Yes from heaven or verse to pop out of my bible that said yes - take every opportunity in front of you or no run for the hills.  It didn't work that way - I woke up and just realized this is what I need to do for now...It may not be where God wants me for the long haul, but it is what God needs me to do now, while I wait. 

I think so often we expect the big answers - we expect so much from God, and it has taken me this long journey of unemployment and especially this last week to realize that God doesn't always have the big answer for you...Sometimes he is okay whether you go in direction A or direction B as long as you are not disobeying him.  My order from God wasn't based on which job He wanted me to have, which is what I expected (mostly because last time I switched jobs - my orders from God were to come to Northern Kentucky via that job), instead my orders from God were to stay in this area.  The job thing is just one way to glorify Him while He continues to work through me in this area...Sometimes I think we expect that God's will is going to be like this big radiant light bulb that goes off over whatever it is that He wants us to do...I have felt the peace that comes with the big decisions - which is that light bulb...God's will isn't always in the light bulb moments.  I think sometimes He calls us in the simple peace as well...The knowing that He is going to take care of you no matter what and trusting in Him with each and every decision made...

As I was driving home tonight from my Wednesday run I was listening to this song by Jamie Grace featuring Toby Mac called Hold Me - It speaks so true of my feelings right now - I love the way God holds me, "In Your Arms I will always be",  "take Each and Every day and make it special in some way."  God never fails us and We will never figure Him out, but He will love us each and every step and help us make it to the next step...We only have to make it to the next step, then He will do the leg work on the step beyond that.  Rest in God's arms always - Love Him and Let Him love you! 

Sunday, March 20, 2011

I'm Running Fast and Free to You

God amazes me!  Not just like an "Aw, precious!" amazement, but an absolute breathtaking surreal kind of amazement.  Nothing in life is suppose to be easy - I know this.  However, I also know that as of late - I have been "here" with God, but I haven't actually been there.  I have followed the motions, and at times thought I was there, but nothing in me was walking side by side with God. 

In reality - I would say I hit rock bottom this weekend.  Have you ever had a moment where you were just at your wit's end?  I did.  Friday night, I was point blank angry and letting God know it.  I am pretty sure the conversation went something like this:

              ME: I DON'T GET IT!  WHAT IS THIS SUPPOSE TO BE ABOUT?  YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHETHER YOU WANT ME TO STAY, OR GO! I HAVE NO JOB, NO HUSBAND, NO KIDS, NO FAMILY!  NOTHING EVER GOES MY WAY!  WHY CAN'T YOU JUST BE CLEAR WITH ME ABOUT SOMETHING IN LIFE?  I DON'T FEEL LIKE ANYTHING I HAVE PRAYED HAS MET A POSITIVE RESPONSE.  I know I'm irrational about this, and I am sorry, but I just need help right now.  I DON'T GET IT!!!!!

God didn't give me a clear answer at that point - and mind you the conversation went on with a lot of apologizing on my part and realizing every other word in that sentence was about I or ME, not about HIM!  I think that's the step that is so easy to forget in our paths.  It's easy to get caught up in the me wants, and the I needs, but it is much harder to get caught up in the God called moments.  How many moments have you had in life where you know God has called you to something without a doubt?  I have only had two that I remember...I might have had more, but if I did, I don't think I understood God enough at the time to realize that is where He wanted me. 

I remember the first - I was on a mission trip in Manaus, Brazil for two weeks doing VBS and working in Favela's(poor neighborhoods).  When I was leaving to come home, I was hugging one of the daughters of the missionaries we were staying with and knew that God was calling me to come back the following summer.  I ended up there for two months the following summer and it was a lesson I will never forget.  The second time, it was for a job change.  God was calling me to take a step of faith and leave my position in Atlanta.  I remember knowing that God was going to move me to Cincinnati before I even stepped off the plane for my interview.  I was confidant that the interview would be successful, because I knew God wanted me here.  And for some reason or another, God has called me to be here for a reason.  Two and a half years later, my job is no longer, but God still wants me here.  I think the hardest thing is not having that same God confidence in the next position. 

This weekend - God has given me a sight I haven't had in a while though - He is restoring my soul, where I had let it crack due to unknown anger with Him.  I have been busy all weekend - Friday with job interviews, Saturday with a Chris Tomlin concert and Sunday with my first 15k marathon, church, meetings, and small group outings.  Friday was my fight with God, Saturday - God moved my soul like I haven't been moved a while - I heard him yelling, calling me back.  I heard his voice, like I hadn't heard it in so long...At the concert - Rend Collective Experiment performed the song in the video below, and I love it:
Sunday just brought more joy - God is everywhere, from the sound of a massive group of people running, as their feet hit the ground, their shoes are singing praise to God, from the joys of meeting a new face among friends.  God reveals himself step after step and it thrills me...Tonight I was probably most thrilled when a friend came to me and said - I want you to know I have been praying for you, specifically about jobs opening up for you...And what do you know - I had about 5 opportunities reveal themselves last week.  I feel blessed to be God's child, and to have such great friends that take the time to listen, to care, to pray. 

"I'm running Fast and Free to You, cause you are the movement and fight in me.  I'm running Fast and Free to You, because you are my Home where I want to be, come move in me!" - Movements by Rend Collective Experiment

Thursday, March 17, 2011

A New Beginning

Today starts a new beginning...the start of a blog.  God has put me at a crossroads in life, and it's time to understand which way to go.  Do you take the safe path or the path full of risks and complete control given to God? 

Have you ever thought about that?  It's scary to think about taking the path less followed.  When it comes to spiritual things, that's an easy choice.  No problem there...I know God wants us to follow Him and deny the world, but when it comes to a job - or not having a job - that's much scarier. 

You see - I have always been a bit of a planner.  Things don't necessarily need to go to my plan, but I at least have a plan in my mind.  I think that comes as a part of being a woman - you always have a contingency and something in your mind, even if it's not what happens.  Well - my plan got disrupted in December when I was downsized from my employment.  Ever since, God has been saying is that really the plan you want to continue?  Do you want to continue down the path of making money in a job that you are good at, but perhaps don't have a passion for or would you rather take a risk, following me completely, relying on me to provide for you?  It's scary to not know the answer - it's not easy either.

Logic, family, the world - They all say continue making money, continue your job.  You can do everything on the side that God wants you to do.  I know that we aren't all called to have missions and ministry be are primary job, I never really thought I would be able to do it, but I had always hoped.  I have wanted to be on the mission field for as long as I can remember, but never thought my spiritual gifts would be a good fit.  I wasn't trusting in what God could do in my life, to make me who he wanted me to be.  I trust now that I can be who He wants me to be - but how do you know if that's truly the path He wants for you? 

God put this devotional in my life yesterday: Encouragement for Today at Crosswalk.com - If you get the chance, go read it. 


Joshua 6:2, “Then the LORD said to Joshua, ’See, I have delivered Jericho into your hands, along with its king and its fighting men.’” (NIV)  - God calls us to understand his faith, trust Him, and know that He will take care of every situation better than we can ever imagine.  Patience - that is just trust in God's timing.